You are not alone!

Do you listen to your teen or early twenty-something speak to his/her peers and not understand what they are talking about? Did you ever think that you would be this clueless? Do you feel like the tools that worked for you while becoming an adult are prehistoric in the face of today's technology and the changed world? Let's talk about it, because we need to help each other!

Monday, January 25, 2010

My daughter tells me that I need to employ tough love with her brother... tough love must exist!

My daughter called me at work and because the sun was shining... a rare event in Oregon... she asked me to go for a walk when I got home. I said yes, of course... she is an 18 year old who actually asked to spend time with her mother, after all. And she is delightful to be with! Well, she set me straight on a few things... and she didn't even read my previous post about tough love. Wow... from the mouths of babes. She had plenty to say about my son taking advantage of me and not taking responsibility for himself and the extent of his ungratefulness and his abuse of privileges and many other things. She told me that I needed to do tough love on him or he would just keep on with more of the same... and that if I really wanted him to face up to what he has done to himself that I can't make things easy for him here at home because then how would he ever learn? Wow.

I love my children so much. When I hear truth from one of them about the other that is painful I wish that they didn't think that about their sibling and that it simply was not true... but my daughter is right and the real question, which I want to avoid, is... what will I do about it?

Practically speaking, I set some limits with my son that ended up with him being very unhappy and me being matter of fact about it... I still need work in this area... and I'm sure my daughter will help keep me honest.

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